What are you worth?

 I know two woman in my life right now that underestimate how awesome they are in a devastating way. Perhaps, when they read this, they will know who they are. They are beautiful and kind. They both have amazing generous hearts. Anyone is blessed to know them or have them in their lives. Unfortunately, they don't agree with me. They have low self esteem. They let people treat them poorly...especially men. Many of you probably know someone like this....maybe you are like this. I know because I was like this.  In each of my past relationships the horrible treatment escalated. In each relationship I would sink into liking myself less and less. My dad was the first to start this trend. I didn't feel good about myself. I didn't like myself. The men I choose needed to share that opioin. I needed men that didn't like themselves or me. Men that would treat me exactly how I felt. Like shit.  I can remember a pinnacle moment with a former boyfriend. We were arguing, I was driving, or had been. He jumped out of the car, came around to the drivers side to pull me out of the car. When I lifted my head, his foot came down right on the bridge of my nose.  He held the car roof with one hand, the door with the other, lifted up and brought his foot down on my face like a teenager smashing a Halloween pumpkin. After, we went into our friends house, blood dripping down my face like nothing happened. I continued on in that relationship for quite awile after that. He treated me just the way I felt I deserved. Make no mistake, we had good times, he could be sweet. Overall, he was broken. I was broken. We were broken.
It was through motherhood that I decided to  demanded better for myself. It was for my daughter. She deserved better. I didn't but she did. When, I met my husband, he seemed to see something in me that I didn't. He really liked me. He was a good man. I didn't get it. I didn't agree with him. However,I decided to let him love me. He loved me until I learned to love myself. Through his eyes, I saw my value. We have been together many years now. He has patched, mended, glued, and loved my self-esteem to a place that runs with the best of them. I joke with him that he's lucky he met me then cuz he couldn't have a chance now. lol. This blog goes out to every woman that doesn't yet know how awesome she really is. My advice is to let someone love you until you can do it yourself. You are amazing. I see it. Your children see it. Others see it....but you don't. Let someone show you. Fake it til you make it Girlfriend. I did.