Feeling a little discouraged

There is a weekly playgroup at a local woman's house on Fridays. We made our first appearance today. I am feeling discouraged. Luckily the kids had a great time. I'm sure they were just happy to be playing with other children. I am so new to this area. It is so unknown. The little parts Ive discovered make my ugly judgmental head rear up. People is San Diego are so put together. Image is not so important out here in the country. That's what I want. I want my kids raised believing image isn't everything...or anything. However, I find myself so programed by my upbringing that I get caught up on image. I'm not sure I will fit in here. This is a very rural area. There is a post office and a grocery store but not much else. The income level is pretty low. There isn't even a police department. Of course that makes this a fantastic place to grow marijuana. It grows so thick here, I can smell it in the air. The mix of people is eclectic. There is large religious population. I'm just feeling so out of place. The moms and their children are so soft spoken. I roll in with my colored hair, tattoos, drinking organic coconut water, screaming....I'm from California. I feel like a stereotype. I don't eat meat. I love organic food. All the children here are so quiet...mine are not. They introduce themselves, join in on conversations, interrupt, and yell. Are country kids shy? Are they taught to be quiet? Are we intimidating? It is just so different, I'm not sure I have the words to explain it. I will say that everybody is very nice. They really are. I'm the outsider. I'm the one who has moved from a place where image is everything. I want to let go of my criticism. Be me and be free!