Frickinfrackinfarfegnugen

Arg!!!! Well, today did not go quite as planned. I got lost on the way to the homeschool orientation, basically I missed it. They explained the waiting list was super long anyway, so back to the drawing board. We got an offer on the house. I should say we got an insult. My husband is so desperate to move he's ready to bend over and ask for lube.  His negativity can be so draining, I question even wanting him here. Of course I want him here. We are a family. We belong together. Right? His closeminded grumpiness can be very grounding for my unrealistic optimistic flightiness, but right now I just want to kick him in his babymaker. Ok, deep breath. It's just a house. It's just money. In the big picture we just want to be together...here! I am trying to convince him to make that happen. We will figure out the rest as it comes. He is practical, hardworking, and responsible so throwing caution to the wind is not in his nature. I want him to set a date...put in his notice and make the move. This fractioned reality is not our dream come true. To make it come true we have to take these risks. Problem is, he's probably right. It is too much to have two mortgages to pay, cobra health insurance, and support 5 kids with no job. Damn him for being such a good man. I'd probably be traveling in an RV by now, selling trinkets by the freeway. Solely, feeding my kids on love and good vibes. He is the Yin to my Yang. Maybe, he is the Yang? I cant help wanting to spew profanity, I just want the separation to be over.